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It's all in the eyesIn his eyes, I see
all the childish desires
he has no intention
of suppressing.

Flecks of green,
fingertips of an endless forest.
Leaves that long to cut their tether
and aimlessly find their way
to the other side of the earth.

He stares
as if he doesn't see
what's in front of him, as if
he's hit rewind, and is replaying
all of the marvelous things
those emerald irises
have absorbed.

His eyelashes
are not stroked by the stale air
of suburbia,
but by the newborn breath of
an electric ocean;
streaks of lightning,
endlessly extending
into an earth that trembles
beneath his feet.

He is a pioneer of the unnecessary,
o

Spring ThunderstormClouds gather
above a shivering landscape,
and it's time for our lips
to cease the utterance
of empty words.

Raindrops find their way
through open windows,
and the drapes caress the wind
as my fingertips discover
the heat of your skin.

The sky ignites
between our lips,
and in your eyes I see
the universe.
Stars burning,
thunder rolling,
infinity forever shifting
between us.

Lightning strikes,
and our hearts are no longer
timid metronomes,
but a thunderstorm of early Spring;
holding eternity within
every drop of rain.

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Imagineby ~RawPoetry

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I have scratched my head over this for a while and just can't decide how to improve it.. I think it's the composition that bugs me, but I just can't put my finger on what it is.

So I'd love to hear any constructive criticism you may have to offer!

other conceptual:

EDIT:

what.... WHAT?! A Daily Deviation? Are you serious?! I am so incredibly not worthy!

I seriously feel like I have enough excitement in me right now to backflip from here to mexico. (which is a very long way, in case you were wondering.)

Thank you thank you THANK YOU to everyone who has commment, faved and viewed! I am going to do everything within my ability to thank all of you, but I will probably run out of steam at some point, so THANK YOU!

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Submitted on: April 23, 2012
Image Size: 4.3 MB
Resolution: 3651×2454
Submitted with: Sta.sh

Views: 11,841 (3 today)
Favourites: 2,195 (who?)
Comments: 259

Camera Data

Make: NIKON CORPORATION
Model: NIKON D3000
Shutter Speed: 10/250 second
Aperture: F/4.0
Focal Length: 60 mm
ISO Speed: 100
Date Taken: April 22, 2012
Software: Adobe Photoshop CS2 Windows

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Daily Deviation

Given 2012-04-24

Imagine by *RawPoetry ( Suggested by ~VisualPoems and Featured by `DemonMathiel )

love 14 14

joy 8 8

wow 5 5

~~mad 0 0~~

~~sad 0 0~~

~~fear 0 0~~

~~neutral 0 0~~

~endo24 Jul 31, 2012

I know! I know!!! (happy little puppy wanting attention- *Style*)

I know what is missing to make this so freaking cool!
You need a larger star - Larger than all the others. To be you focal point and it needs to be placed on the binding. So it looks like a shooting star with the pages streaming out behind it!!! OH, and leave the other smaller stars in... JUST add the largest star to the binding. Oooooo! And I just thought of this- angle the shot so the star is shooting up! Please try it!!!